In honor of the intelligence challenged
In case you needed further proof that the human race is doomed through stupidity, here are some actual label instructions on consumer goods.

On a Sears hairdryer -- Do not use while sleeping.
(Damn, and that's the only time I have to work on my hair).

On a bag of Fritos -- You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside.
(the shoplifter special)?

On a bar of Dial soap -- "Directions: Use like regular soap."
(and that would be how???...)

On some Swanson frozen dinners -- "Serving suggestion: Defrost."
(but, it's "just" a suggestion).

On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom) -- "Do not turn upside down."
(well...duh, a bit late, huh)!

On Marks &Spencer Bread Pudding -- "Product will be hot after heating."
(...you think????..)

On packaging for a Rowenta iron -- "Do not iron clothes on body."
(but wouldn't this save me more time)?

On Boot's Children Cough Medicine -- "Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication."
(We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we could just get those 5-year-olds with head-colds off those forklifts .)

On Nytol Sleep Aid -- "Warning: May cause drowsiness"
(no shit, really?)

On most brands of Christmas lights -- "For indoor or outdoor use only."
(as opposed to...what)?

On a Japanese food processor -- "Not to be used for the other use."
(now, somebody out there, help me on this. I'm a bit curious.)

On Sainsbury's peanuts -- "Warning: contains nuts."
(talk about a news flash)

On an American Airlines packet of nuts -- "Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts."
(Step 3: maybe, uh...fly Delta?)

On a child's Superman costume -- "Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly."
(I don't blame the company I blame the parents for this one.)

On a Swedish chainsaw -- "Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands or genitals."
(Oh my God...was there a lot of this happening somewhere?)

Classic's never get old. hehehehehehehehe.......

davyp said:

so normanly my balls could stop a regular chainsaw!?!?!?! ha!

Abbath, the answer is yes... yes it would.....

Elephantitis of the nuts anyone.

morkul said:

you just made me think of Breakfast Club
one of my all time faves
thanks =)

"Monet really pumps my nads". "Hey sporto, why don't you close that door and we get the prom queen impregnated" .

i have balls of steel that break any ordinary pussy american chainsaw. those swedish viking chainsaws ain't nothin to fuck with. i have the scars to prove it.

i wanna see someone stop a chainsaw
with their genitals... especially a female

davyp said

On packaging for a Rowenta iron -- "Do not iron clothes on body."
(but wouldn't this save me more time)?

my moms done that before and she burned herself .. she a dumb lady

morkul said:

it's one of my all time faves



to you for posting these!

MyDeadDoll said:

the girl in dawn of the dead couldn't

oh sweet! i'm never gonna get to see that movie! I HATE ME LIFE!