So I did this final project for my sound design course, it was a 4 minute narrative audio story, and we got a couple voice actors to read the script (and MikeofDecrepitude to do the voice of a sea monster, which came out fucking mint). We were short on time, so I'd basically take anybody who could make it on the night we wanted to record. One of the available few turned out to be this kid Michael who has been a pain in my ass for almost a week now.

First, he neglected to tell us when he presented himself as a voice actor that he's Filipino or something, and has an accent and a lisp. Then he forgot his notebook at the place we were recording at, and I was nice enough to grab it for him.

Then the phonecalls started.

I was at work the next day when this kid called like 5 or 6 times. I was in the middle of something, and couldn't take the calls. At one point I looked at my phone, and saw I had 3 voicemails, and 4 text messages from this kid pleading with me to please contact him because his notebook meant a lot to him. That's fine, I respect that. People have sentimental attachments to things. I texted him back and told him his notebook was in good hands, and that I'd be glad to give it back to him.

For the next few days he'd either call me while I was busy, or just as I was leaving Boston, and things just wouldn't work out for us to meet up so I could hand him this thing. Meanwhile I'm lugging this kid's binder around with me everywhere, 24 hours a day, and this kid will not stop texting me telling me how much this binder means to him. I was extremely busy trying to get this final project edited, and delivered and I didn't have a lot of time for taking phone calls, and meeting people over inanimate objects.

I'm on the train this morning, and my phone vibrates. I look down at it: 6 new messages. The last one reads "I WANT MY NOTEBOOK TODAY OR I'M CALLING THE POLICE."

I'm about 1 more text message away from lighting it on fire, and sending him a picture of it.

Do it.

Have rough sex with his grandfather.

I wanna burn it!!!!

Has Careerbuilder found you a job as a guidance councilor yet? America's troubled youth needs this kind of advice.

Now that I have a job do I have to end my friemdship with Careerbuilder? Serious question.

Nah, keep it. It'll make you look like a go-getter. Like "This guy's so ambitious, he doesn't even want to work for our nickel and dime operation."

wow.... or i'm calling the police huh? well, i think as far as legality goes, his calling you relentlessly over this thing would probably fall under harrasment. Which is an actual charge.... as opposed to "you found my stuff, and your not quick enough to give it back"... which by the way, i think your under NO obligation to do. So either give him a harassment charge to think about, or like you said. Burn the bitch.

Good luck with the project Mike. Sorry if my Sailor voice-over wasn't adequate; of course I doubt Disney will be requesting my voice talents for Madagascar 4 anytime soon.

possession is nine tenths of the law.

We ended up re-doing your lines only because one of the voice actors that read was so ridiculously good that it changed the whole piece. The DM vocals more than made up for it though. We presented it in class the other day, and when I had to explain to my professor how we did the sea monster sounds he couldn't believe that we didn't pitch shift your voice down. The whole class was blown away by it.

Haha, that's awesome

Haha, that'd be great if I actually wanted to keep this kid's stupid notebook.

That kid's ominous Ahab impression was hilarious. I don't really think it was meant to be though.

So I gave him the address of my work, and told him he could come down and pick it up. I didn't hear from him all morning, and then at about 1:30 the calls, and texts started. "I'm coming down right now." "Please let me know if you got this." "I'm on my way please call me." I'm in the middle of a job, and I don't have time to sit and chat with this kid, so I tell him exactly where to meet me.

He calls me up 10 minutes later to ask where to go, and I find out he's in completely the wrong part of Boston. He spend 5 minutes giving him directions, and then he ends up driving past my work and almost into Dorchester, then calls me to ask if I can stay on the phone with him until he gets there. No.

Finally I get a call that he's on the right street. I tell him, just pull over on the corner, and I'll stop what I'm doing for a minute to come out, meet him, and give him back his precious fucking notebook. While I'm walking from the door to the corner I get a text "Please Hurry Up, I have to goto work." I walked out to the corner, knocked on his windshield and dumped it end over end into his passenger seat and left.

Meanwhile I get a text from Tom... "Burn it, be a man Hogan."

you didn't even look in it? wtf

haha what a jackass.

I wouldve replaced it with mindblowing goatse images. Page after page of goatses.

We've got 2 guidance councilors in 1 thread. Word up.