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returntothepit >> discuss >> ERNEST BORGNINE's Secret To Old Age: yank that crank!!! by AUTOPSY_666 on Aug 15,2008 3:09am
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toggletoggle post by AUTOPSY_666   at Aug 15,2008 3:09am edited Aug 15,2008 3:09am
Ernest Borgnine is keeping busy - masturbating. The 91-year-old legend appeared on Fox & Friends to promote his book and was asked his secret to longevity. He leaned in and whispered (easily heard over the microphone) "I masturbate a lot." The hosts were in hysterics, rightly.


bennyhillifier




toggletoggle post by AUTOPSY_666   at Aug 15,2008 3:10am
When I was in the seventh grade a bunch of boys were sitting around the same table in the cafeteria at lunch time.

Somebody whispered that "jacking off" was supposed to make hair grow in the palm of your hand.

Every boy at the table suddenly, and urgently looked at his hand!



toggletoggle post by ouchdrummer   at Aug 15,2008 8:54am
it will help prevent epidydimitis too.



toggletoggle post by FuckIsMySignature at Aug 15,2008 9:08am
countdown to crazy masturbation stories in

3


2


1



GO!



toggletoggle post by thuringwethil at Aug 15,2008 10:21am
Borgnine is the man.

I watched Escape from New York last night, he saves Plisken's ass like, 5 million times in that movie



toggletoggle post by infect  at Aug 15,2008 11:18am
hahahahahha! the way he says it is so creepy too



toggletoggle post by mOe  at Aug 15,2008 11:20am
I thought he was awesome because he was in BASEketball...but this trumps that....wait, no it doesnt. Its still cool, though.



toggletoggle post by grizloch   at Aug 15,2008 11:44am
Jesus Christ, Im never going to die...



toggletoggle post by dreadkill  at Aug 15,2008 11:56am
best thing ever. he rules.



toggletoggle post by thuringwethil at Aug 15,2008 11:59am
hahaha

"I shook his hand!"



toggletoggle post by Yeti at Aug 15,2008 1:04pm
grizloch said[orig][quote]
Jesus Christ, Im never going to die...


hahahaha seriously



toggletoggle post by FuckIsMySignature at Aug 15,2008 1:42pm
DEATH BY MASTURBATION



toggletoggle post by SacreligionNLI at Aug 15,2008 1:54pm
FuckIsMySignature said[orig][quote]
IMMORTALITY BY MASTURBATION


fixed



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