So, I have this funny little neurological thing where my brain doesn't understand anyone else's brain. The signals and cues that tell most people what other people are thinking, feeling and saying don't trigger anything to my brain. Body language, speech patterns and inflections, verbal inferences, it's all static to me. I know that people are happy when they smile because I learned that by repetition; I know how people sound when they're pissed (and how I should sound when I am, too) by watching movies and pissing people off a lot. I've even learned to talk like you. When I speak, I speak "in character," with voices I've learned over the years (stolen bits and pieces of stand-up comics and characters from movies), because otherwise I sound like a robot with a mouth full of marbles; it's a monotone mumble. My brain doesn't, by default, put pauses, rhythms and tones into my speech on its own - it won't do the work to translate it into people-talk unless I make it. So being around people is a full-time job - I'm "on" all the time around them, because I have to pay close attention to people to tell what the fuck they're going on about (seemingly non-stop), and how I should respond. And they do keep talking. I can't automatically shut them out, selectively, unless I just "turn off" - being in a room full of simultaneous conversations is like having earmuffs on, because the ones I'm not listening to get equal time with the one I'm trying to hear. And being around you fucking monkeys tires me out, it really does. It's fucking draining. Getting home and going to my room is the ultimate goal at the end of my day, because I don't have anyone's facial expression in my field of view to think about; no one is going to tell me anything that I have to figure out subtext to, and I don't have to put on a voice and talk. It's paradise.

Anyway, obviously not looking for sympathy here. Not looking for it anywhere, as a matter of fact - I like the way my brain works. There are plenty of upsides to my neurology - I'm not going into them here (this post is about bitching, after all), but I consider them more than compensation. Mostly that - when I have a mind to? - I can tune you all out like flipping a switch. Regardless, I figured one or two of you misanthropic fucks would have some idea where I'm coming from.


(tl;dr: I NEAD MY HUGBOX LOL)

so you've learned to live with your ADD or ADHD....congratulations! i cherish being alone as well, but also want my wife and kids around. it's a fine balance

i'm no neurologist, but it sounds way more like an autistic trait than ADHD.

Funny thing is - a little bit of ADD does tend to go hand in hand with it (and believe you me, that's the case here), but what I'm talking about there is actually Asberger syndrome - basically autism light. I'm like Rain Man but better at talking shit. And possibly a better driver.

mortalis said:

*dingdingdingdingding*

DestroyYouAlot said:

yeah, my brother's got aspergers, though hes kind of an odd case on his own. very gregarious and social, but without the understanding of cues. still, i'm familiar with the autism spectrum and whatnot.

DON'T BELIEVE PUSHER ROBOT. GO NEAR THE STAIRS.AAAAAAA

Funny thing is (well, funny unless you marry one of us) that nearly every male in my dad's family exhibits this shit to one degree or another - it's always just been the "Smith thing." It wasn't until my younger brother (who's WAY more closed-off then I am) got diagnosed that we kinda figured out what it was, but it does tend to be passed on by the father - we just pass it on REALLY well, apparently.

The upshot of all this is out of all of the boys in my dad's family (5 out of 9), 3 (the 3 oldest) have turned into hermits of one sort or another. Seriously: Jack (the oldest) is sort of a highly personable, philosphical drifter - one or the other of us hears from him a few times a year. Larry split up with the wife and built a cabin in the woods (in Illinois, I believe). And my dad's retired, he and my mom are still together, but he kinda hangs out in his RV in the back yard a lot. When he's home, which is not much of the time, as he kinda wanders around the world, a lot. He's got a world map with pins in it (one color for places he was in the army, one color for real life), and he adds a country or two to it each year. He hasn't hit Antarctica, yet, although he's hoping to pull it off before he's 80 (he's 78, now). He's in China right now, just kinda hanging out. Takes the bus places. Passes out balloons to kids. (Personally, I'm starting to strongly suspect that my dad has got life figured out, which is sort of unnerving.)

the_reverend said:

PAK CHOOIE UNF

can you count toothpicks? That would be sick.
i self medicate myself with music and other shit that peaks my interest. Its a nice and mediocre solution. And it makes me look badass in a no one really thinks im badass cuz im not kinda way... don't tell me that tho.

ps someone wrote their address in your profile thinking it was private... you probably should delete that shit broseph. nyuck nyuck nyuck

DestroyYouAlot said:


yep, it's definitely from my dad's side, too. also a Smith. *insert twilight zone music*

I have been diagnosed with Asperger's syndrome.

It's okay, I guess.

i've got a few traits. hypersensitivity, really getting into a certain subject matter, and a little OCD. however, i wish i weren't as good at reading people as i am, hah. would make things easier.

I was diagnosed as being a wise ass. chooie unf

bennyhillifier

Asperger's syndrome is when most people think you're really weird and you think most people are really boring.

bennyhillifier
bahahaha
this was in the menu of the shoverrobot

It sounds like Dyssemia to me.....My niece has it as well...go look it up.

alex! not you too. look guys, don't believe the shooverbot. what is wrong with you eole. believe the usherbot now go near the stairs.

and DYA, just drink some beer and we will sing blind cuardian for the hobbitses

guardian

That video alex posted is awesome.

the pusher bot is where its at

I can't fucking believe you.

that video is pretty sweet.

and this is the perfect girl for you all
http://blog.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseacti...friendID=150103974&blogID=230603034

That girl is my fucking hero.

i definitely have a form of aspergers, plus a bad case of echophrasia. its taken me years to get it under control.

i don't think the problem is you guys. it's having to deal with this fucked up world. most people ARE fucking boring, *rObOtS* even. mindless drones regurgitating everything they see on TV and emulating their favorite rap or emo group. people don't have their own opinions anymore, only restating things they've heard. but that's what we'eve been taught form birth:
" OK here are some books of things you need to learn. Memorize them the best you can and we'll give you a good grade! If you dont, you get a bad gade and you will be considered troubled and we will send you to the doctor where they will give you medication to fix the problem, but all it really does is completely numb you and destroy your sense of humanity! It's OK though because now you will be able to learn everything we feed you! Now try and be more like Pete, he is a great student and athlete. Everybody loves him!"
Well guess what? I know Pete and he fuckin date raped a girl and beat the shit out of some kid until he died and now he's in jail.(true story)
You don't have a problem. Your symptoms are only natural reactions to an unnatural world. Don't belive the fucking lies. Transmission over...

I know pete too and he's a great guy and me and him built a *rObOt* out of some cool magnetic lego set. He came to my birthday and bought me a train set! pete is a very nice guy, don't believe the fucking lies. Transmission over...

MikePile said:

the REAL Pete from Boston Globe


Violent reputation follows twins
After Ayer killing, residents recall a history of intimidation and resentment
By Douglas Belkin, Globe Staff | July 17, 2005

When an explosion jarred Ron DeFilippo from his sleep at 4:30 on a February morning four years ago, he looked out of his bedroom window and saw the tricked-out green Honda Accord parked in his neighbor's driveway engulfed in orange flames.

The car belonged to Daniel and (PETE)Peter McGuane, a pair of then 17-year-old twins with a rising reputation as town bullies and a growing list of enemies. As startling as the fire appeared, DeFilippo wasn't entirely shocked. His first thought: The car was torched because someone wanted to send the twins a message.

''They always had to be the tough guys," DeFilippo said of the twins last week. ''Everyone just sort of assumed it was payback or something."

Those ''tough guys" made headlines this month when they were charged with murdering a 19-year-old former football star who happened across their path after the town's Independence Day fireworks on July 2. Kelly Proctor, a former schoolmate of the McGuanes, was allegedly kicked to death as he tried to crawl under a truck to escape his attackers


http://www.boston.com/news/local/articles/...7/violent_reputation_follows_twins/

So, wait - the car had Asperger's? I'm confused.

assburger

toast zee buns

I thought aspergers made your piss stink.