Sorry for the paperwork, but we need you to fill this out and mail it to popular-music@whitehouse.gov. Not only is it the unwritten law of the Elders of Zion, but you can get federal grants if you qualify as zogerrific.

ZOG Band Registration

Name of band:
Contact person:
Contact phone:

Does your band have members of multiple races (yes/no)?

Does your band have female members (yes/no)?

Does your band have homosexuals, drug addicts, welfare cheats, or Jews (yes/no)?

How many times has your band rejected a show because some guy in the other band was wearing a Cro-Mags shirt?

How many times have you performed for:
__ Charity benefit for the Jewish people
__ Charity benefit for the mentally challenged
__ Charity benefit for the physically challenged
__ Charity benefit for bisexuals, homosexuals or power metal fans
__ Government employees, troops or Rabbinical students

What is the political outlook of your band?
__ Far left
__ Anti-racist Republican
__ Nazis

What, in US $, is your annual expenditure on the band?
__ $250 for guitar + amp used on eBay
__ $2,000 for equipment, drugs and pay to play
__ $20,000 of daddy's money for metalcore band

Thank you for your cooperation (if you did not cooperate, expect us to discovery drugs or child porn in your house shortly).

- ZOG

I vote for boobs

Jewish boobs