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:	post by reimroc at 2009-08-11 15:14:13

thanks aril. i'll repost my story for all of you to read and hopefully learn from if you have an addictive personality and are thinking about experimenting with cocaine or opiates. really its for all of you to know where i'm coming from.

And here we go.....

Around the age of 16 I started experimenting with Oxycontin, Percocets, Vicodin and the like. The first time I blew an oxy it was the greatest thing I ever felt in my entire life. Better than sex, better than love, better than the meaning and logic of emotion itself. Before I knew it I had a habit taking about 2 80 OCs a day and that grew to 4 a day. Finally taking those things got way to expensive(this was around 03 when the government starting cracking down and prices went from 30-50 an OC80 to 70-100 for an OC80) so I asked around and got my first bag of dope(dope being heroin so if you see me write that thats what I mean, not weed or anything else). Being that heroin got me that same great opiate high at a low price I was in love. I couldn't get anough of it. But before I knew it snorting the stuff wasn't getting the job done anymore, wasn't getting me high like it used to. So one day after consulting a couple people I knew who had booted(shot, injected) heroin before I tried it. Needless to say it was the greatest thing I ever felt since the first time I blew an oxy. Before I knew it I had a 2 gram a day habit and I was burning every bridge I had. This way by my 18th birthday. Shortly after I got arrested and put on probation for breaking into my neighbors house. This led me to drug court, a halfway house and the means of recovery that got me clean and sober for 2 years. It was a happy, amazing 2 years ad I gained the trust back of my family and friends. I got my degree and certifications for database administration. I was on the right track. This leads us to a couple months ago when I broke down after being stressed and NOT using the tools I had to keep me from using, I used. Since then, a couple months ago, I've had an off and on habit and basically being a "functioning addict". I didn't burn any bridges, I didn't lose my job and I pretty much kept my using again a secret from everyone until a month later my mother found my stash of used needles in my room. Needless to say they were dissapointed. I was dissapointed in myself as well. Since then I continued being off and on again. Using a couple days here a couple days there. The past couple of weeks I decided to start using everyday and now I'm paying for it with some shitty withdrawls but I need to stop before I get back to the way I was before I got clean and sober a couple years ago.

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