I don't think there has been a thread like this here. I'm sure there are a lot of times where people on this site have done something stupid, almost died, and are amazed they didn't.

With Ryan, so many times.

We really need to work on our safeword.

yes.

I'm fairly certain that over the years there's been quite a few times that I've almost died. Stupid things on skateboards and bikes, stupid things with cars, cliff jumping, award-winning drug/alcohol intake, etc.

Cheating death can be quite satisfying.

1987 Yosemite. I think right by half dome. I chased after a large bear. Thankfully it didn't turn around and come at me bro.

Wrapped my car around a tree in Wilton, NH in early 2012. I literally would not have lived if I hit it even slightly differently; they would have been hosing me out or prying me out of the folded-over seat if that was the case. Put me in UMass Med for ten days, as well.

I hit an overhang beam with my head when I was 13 on a mini-bike at full speed, if not for the helmet I would have a nice dent in my skull. Then there's those moments driving when you say "well if that was 2 seconds later, I'd be fucked up"

/r/askRTTP is a great idea.

many close calls driving. Like on the old Storrow drive off ramp, doing a 180 in wet snow with an 18 wheeler screaming towards me. Got it into gear and back around, barely in time. The big scary truck would have crushed me, he was sliding to a non stop.

I worked pumping gas at a dilapidated old gas station in my teens and one afternoon the oil burner that heated the little building and all the fuel in the oil tank blew up. The chimney cap flew 100 feet into the air and landed on a neighboring house's lawn. Thankfully I was not inside the building when it went boom. A firefighter on the scene told me I should play the lottery that night, as I was lucky I wasn't in the office, and lucky the explosion didn't impact the thousands of gallons of gasoline in the underground tanks about 15 yards away.

jumping into a 40 foot rock quarry full of water in the middle of the night. there was zero light aside from a campfire and I have never scoped out the area previously. so lucky I didn't go splat.

Almost drowned at a family pool party when I was knocked into the deep end by a drunk family friend. No one saw it happen except my dad who was just about to take off on his motorcycle; luckily he got me out in time, but I remember coughing up a lot of water. Pretty sweet for one of my earliest memory, haha.

That's what happens who you select a full recitation of a Langston Hughes poem as a safeword

Also, I cum that much harder when you're purple

Getting pushed into a friend's pool when I was 3, almost hydroplaning off of the Pike while crossing the CT river, a guy dropping 3 16 foot planks off of a 60 foot roof about ten feet in front of where I was walking, a masonry truck full of rock pulling out in front of a dunkin donuts without seeing me while I was driving 50 mph down rt. 20, getting pushed off the monkey bars during recess and landing on my head, a drunk lady t-boning the side of a car I was in while she crossed a road doing 50 the wrong way up a one way street, 20+ foot fall out of a tree when I was 5, almost getting impaled on a fence while backyard wrestling in high school, drunkenly blind cliffdiving the same night as Tony. I am unbreakable.

I lost control of my car once on 401 in North Carolina. I wouldn't really say that was near death, but I do shudder to think of what could have happened had I not regained control.

Forgot about that time I was hiking in the Cinque Terre region of Italy last October and tripped over my own foot; I would have fallen to my death onto a bunch of rocks on the banks of the Mediterranean Sea about 1200' below me if it weren't for a single olive branch. I don't understand why the fuck that shit is part of a group tour.

In before Niagara Falls

you might say life "extended you an olive branch". hyuck.

twice...went really far before i was revived one of the times

what a fun almost end of life.

Almost bought an Apple computer.

Macintosh -> Faggotry -> AIDS -> Death.

here you go snow blowers. guess you all going to have to start cooking it. HA HA
Flesh-Eating Cocaine Found in N.Y., L.A.

Niagara Falls

Messing around with what I thought was a broken light switch in my bedroom when I was about 10. Remember hearing a pop...seeing a flash. Woke up on the floor some time later with burnt fingertips and a blackened wall.