Don't want to be on the can, or in the shower, you know? Thanks.

6PM at the flag pole. dont be late or you'll miss your century media gift bag.

No no no no no, the RAPTURE is tomorrow. The rest of the world ends in October. Can't you people read???

So.... the Apocalypse is in October, then?
Date/Time, please?

i hope i'm fapping.

of course you will be, what do you think causes it?

If the rapture were to occur (which, technically, there IS no rapture in the bible) then the actual "end of the world" after that takes something like 10 years. So we're still good. There's gonna be some earthquakes, the sun will go out, and most of the fish and game die. And poison water. Oh yes, and our pets and all the animals try to kill us. And there's some locusts. Some other awful shit too.

But then Jesus comes charging out of heaven at the end of those ten years. And if he's cool with you, you get to live on with him for 1000 years in perfect bliss on earth. THEN they destroy the earth, for a laugh. So in all, the world ends around 1010 years after saturday.


And I got a feeling Jesus is gonna like most of us. I mean, he's leading the four horsemen, and we like metallica. He'll have a flaming sword, and we like grilling meat. It all works out well, I'm betting.

And when is 2012 happening? Sometime next year, I heard

Oh, I almost forgot, there's a big shitty comet called "Wormwood" that will take out our entire continent. That's gonna be shitty for those of us that own property.

I just got in trouble because of this post. I was laughing so hard that the people on the other side of the conference call in the next room thought my boss was laughing at them.... I guess the conversation was pretty touchy anyway, so i really put it over the top. BOO YA

totally different thing. 2012 is the end of the Mayan calendar. Has nothing to do with god or rapture. Instead, people believe it means the end of the world. In actuality, it probably just means the Mayans didn't bother with the rest of the calendar, because they knew that the aliens would have come and picked them up by then.



Get your cuckoo end of the world shit straight! You don't wanna show up for Ragnarok declaring Jesus as your savior, or vice versa.

I like wormwood, it contains thujone.

and by "shitty comet" he means "CD by Marduk"

But it's already tomorrow in Australia... can we nail this thing down, please?

I made it a point to read most of the "Left Behind" books. What I have learned is that in the event of the apocalypse, follow Kirk Cameron.

I just can't wait to shoot Christian zombies in the head.

Why wait?

ONE HOUR AND SEVEN MINUTES UNTIL RAPTURE

No dude, it's TOMORROW... put your clothes back on

BUT I WANT IT TO BE TODAY

i hope Jesus returns just because he wants to see Defeated Sanity.

fixd

Hmmm. I wonder if Jesus is a pit ninja?

Probably. Douchebag.

Jesus multiplies slices of pizza at hardcore shows.

^win

Some would argue that Jesus is, in fact, ruining hardcore in many areas. Coincidence? You be the judge.

We all know Jesus was black metal. I assume he'll be gunning for IWRESTLEDWITHDUDESINHIGHSCHOOL and that other band whose name I won't bother looking up. And then BlackMetalLady will give birth to JESUS' son, and I GOT DIBS ON WRITING THE NEXT BIBLE.

5:21

loled.

Can't it wait 'til after the Stanley Cup comes home to Boston?

Please, Dino-Jesus?

"But about that day or hour no one knows, not even the angels in heaven, nor the Son, but only the Father." Mark 13:32

No, the finals should be over sometime in June

RAPTURE RESCHEDULED
New Date: TBA

Engraved in bone will play this rapture show