i'm bored and about to take a nap. but i've been thinking about terrible movies i've seen at the theaters. and when i wake up from said nap. i wanna see what you guys put. here goes.

10.) godzilla(matthew broderick v.s. a-sexual, t-rex, godzilla abortion.)
man this movie sucked. and i had to see it twice cuz my little brother wanted to see it. the second time i fell asleep at the beginning and woke up at the end.

9.) hulk(2003 ang lee piece of shit.) watch nick nolte ruin a whole fucking movie in 3 hours. i also had to see this fucker twice cuz my grandmother wanted to see it. epic fail!

8.) mortal kombat: annihilation. i had to see this cuz once again my brother wanted to see it. the sound cut out for 20 minutes in the middle of it. i did not give a fuck

7.) transformers(wtf?) yeah, this movie fucking sucks. fuck you!

6.) how to lose friends and alienate people. in this instance, 2 shots of tranny cock and simon pegg being awkwardly funny could not save this. piece of shit.

5.)hostel part 2. hey, i have an idea. lets take the first movie. switch the genders of the lead characters. make it half as long, but twice as shitty. yeah, fuck me.

4.) hills have eyes 2. GAY!! i should have known though.

3.) feardotcom. my brother's g/f at the time, worked at a theater, so we were bored one day so we decided to get some use out of her. it was free. but christ it was like taking 20 dicks to each eye socket. . . and an ice chisel to the anus.

2.) cabin fever. when your friend stands up in mid movie; while a child is doing slow motion kung-fu, after repeating the word pancakes over and over. and your friend says "WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON?!?" and everyone laughs. then you and your friends take an oath to never speak of the viewing of said movie to anyone ever. and you tell people you did something else that night. . . oops. then you know you had a bad night. fuck that movie, and fuck eli roth!

1.) blair witch project. over rated piece of fucking shit. fuck your hand held horror and fuck you! good night!

honorable mentions aka movies i had the sense to walk out of.

the weatherman. i left cuz i actually felt uncomfortable about a child potentially about to be molested by a guidance counciller.

the ladykillers. fuck tom hanks post 1980's

i'm sure theres more. i'll update post nap.

oh yeah. honorable mention that i stayed for but hoped it would get better but never did.

blade: trinity. ryan reynolds was my only joy. hold me ryan. hold me.

Hostel 2 was wayyyyy better than part one.
the torture scenes were better, and it explained all the behind the scenes shit.

Hills have eyes 2 was awful, but the rape scene was great.

CABIN FEVER????
i loved that fucking movie!
what was wrong with it.
the old dude who everyone thought was racist, and then the three black kids came back for the gun.....funny as fuck!!!
the screwdriver in the big slow dudes head = epic!
the guy fingering the chick and getting blood and rotten flesh on his hand = amazing!!!

and how do they end the movie?????
by showing you that the whole world is fucked because that disease is in the water!!

how could you hate that??

oh, and the dumb "pancakes" kid was funny as hell

1.)camp nowhere
2.)mean girls
3.)blair witch 2
4.)starwars episode 1
5.)starwars episode 2
6.)3 ninjas
7.)neverending story II (although not too bad, i guess.)

one of the most boring movies I've seen lately I actually didn't see in theaters. it's the one that was loosly based off of Kurt Cobain's life. Can't remember the name of it, but it put me to sleep.

A lot of these I got dragged to by chicks.

Always - Gotta be the worst Speilburg movie ever. I though it might have been tolerable because John Goodman was in it but, nope. Gay chick flick. Gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay.....

Dead Man Walking - Lots of people raved about this. Boring as Hell. And was Sean Penn's character supposed to be sympathetic?? In any way at all?? I don't get it. Took 2 hours (though it seemed like 4 hours) to get to the execution scene, by which point I didn't even give a shit anymore.

Fantasia - My mom took me and my little brother to this when I was probably 6 years old. I was expecting a Disney type of cartoon movie. Not some gay animation set to boring classical music. My brother hated it too. We left after 30 minutes.

Uncle Buck - Why anyone though John Candy could carry a movie on his own is beyond me. About as funny as the all female stand-up comedy revue. The giant pancake scene was the funniest thing in the whole movie. That oughtta tell you something.

that's all I can think of off the top of my head and its time to go home

drop acid and watch it.
very nice trip enhancer

Blue Chips
The Saint
Blue Streak
Jeepers Creepers 2
Eragon (kid wants to fuck his dragon. end of movie)

These are the reason I don't go to the theater unless is absolutely have to.

I can't believe how far Eragon went. I remember hearing about it because some highschool student wrote it as a book, and BOOM next thing you know, it's a movie and a videogame.
What a fucking unoriginal name too. HMMM, let's drop the "D" in "dragon" and put the next letter in the alphabet - "ERAGON"
yea, way to go, kid.

hitchhikers guide to the galaxy
indiana jones 4

Jeepers Creepers is the only one i can think of right now probably because i'm only thinking with one brain cell right now.

Top 5
Darkness - ugh
indiana jones 4 - Indy was Raped
Hulk (Ang Lee) - boring as fuck
Star Wars 1 - crap
Lord of the Rings 1 - have appresh for it now but at the time i was bored to tears

Also - Uncle Buck is one of my favorite movies ever.

Oh, WHITE NOISE

Transformers
Cloverfield
Ring
That steven speilburg haunted house animated movie
hostel 2



other than that i only see movies that i get super excited about and know i'm going to love

oh shit, how could i forget jeepers creepers.

also, with cabin fever. i think what put me off was it was like a troma movie, right after the squirrels are gay scene. and i can remember feeling bamboozled that i got tricked into paying for troma in the theaters. i dunno, i just dont like it. gore aside.

hostel 2 left me wanted more. and it just left me there, with balls as blue as ice.

itt dave is a homo and a racist.
"come on boys, out of the closet and into the streets! the sthouth will cum again!"

i'd pay to see Toxic Avenger in the theater. cabin fever is crap though.

Zodiac (WAAAAAAAAAAAAY too long)
Aliens vs. Predator
Eragon (I was invited and I had nothing else to do)

I don't remember too much else.

thank you. I've been saying the same thing since seeing that.

the strangers
tropic thunder
my girl 2.. possibly the worst movie ever
titanic

i also have to add

the strangers
and boogeyman.

i forced those ones out of my brain.

jeepers creepers is the whole list. yes, i saw it 10 times in the theater, just for this thread.

Stepmom
The Happening(I knew this one would suck though, just wanted the lolz)
The Strangers
Pearl Harbor

i actually liked the happening. i went in fully expecting crap, and i got children being gunned down brutally, and lots of silly acting. but i liked it

get out

Thats the wrongest statement, period.

i definitely don't understand the Uncle Buck hate. i watched that last night. a brilliant movie.

i can't name 10, but these are what i can remember:

1. Rushmore. what a stupid piece of shit.
2. Cabin Fever. another stupid piece of shit.
3. Dungeons and Dragons. this piece of shit needs no explanation.
4. Anchorman. i almost walked out on that piece of shit. The Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants was more entertaining.

To this day, I will hold a grudge against my friends for convincing me to see this.

the only redeeming part to Godzilla was when Hank Azaria talked like Lenny. haha Mortal Kombat: Annihilation was awful. Motaro looked like the heroin junkie version of the game.

I don't think I can come up with 10, and I'm sure there are several movies that sucked more than the ones I'm going to list, but can't remember them...probably for a good reason. This list is in no particular order.

1. The Hulk (Ang Lee, of course) - This movie could have been abridged to 45 minutes, or at least just cut down to the dog-ball punching scene. A guy behind me answered his cell phone in the middle of the movie, and I was more interested in hearing what his conversation was about. Most of the theater could hear him clear as day and no one cared, haha. Fuck this movie.

2. Saw I - I enjoy all the other Saw movies, but this one sucked a huge dick. Terrible acting, not enough gore, and way too fucking predictable. I heard somewhere that it was supposed to be a "psychological thriller masked as a horror movie." Well guess what...I wanted to see a fucking HORROR MOVIE. And for a psychological thriller they really fucked it up; the horrible acting gave away the ending, if you paid enough attention. There were some cool parts, don't get me wrong, but overall I wanted to kill myself and the 15 year old girls screaming every 3 seconds.

3. Jeepers Creepers - I refused to see this movie, but Dave Maggot said it was going to be awesome (haha, I'm totally throwing you under the bus), so I trusted his judgment. I can never forgive you Dave, haha. This movie started out with promise; if the angel of death faggot just stayed a creepy, backwoods hick with a cavern made out of human corpses, this movie would have ruled. I knew I was watching the gayest movie ever (even gayer than gay porn) when the jeeper creeper guy made out with a decapitated male cop's head. The only thing that made this movie enjoyable was the constant heckling and jokes coming from pretty much everyone in the theater.

4. Cabin Fever - Looking back on it, this movie was pretty damn entertaining. BUT, at the time I wanted to kill myself. I was expecting a decent horror movie, not a half-assed horror/comedy or whatever the fuck it turned out to be. There were some good lines, some nice gory scenes and some total curve balls, but in the end I probably would have been better off staying home and masturbating.

5. Queen Of The Damned - I didn't expect to be floored by this movie, but was interested in it nonetheless. This was the first and only movie I ever fell asleep during in a theater. I can't even tell you what this movie was about except that Aaliyah was the Queen and some douchebag was some big rock and roll star who played some huge concert, blah blah blah, the end.

6. Star Wars: The Phantom Menace - I think was only 12 or 13 at the time this came out, and I was easily excited by movies of this persuasion. This movie made me want to cry, and has ruined my enjoyment of the first 3 Star Wars. George Lucas can eat a bag of dicks.

7. Alien Vs. Predator - Gay.

That's all I can think of.

I feel a lot less like a cheap bastard for downloading most of these and deleting after two scenes.

The second star wars trilogy -- oh, I'm sorry, it's officially The First -- is like eating an ass without a napkin.

uhhh 3 ninjas is the greatest movie ever!

I'm sorry but mean girls is fucking hilarious.

Mark, what was that movie we saw that the fat lady in front of us wouldn't stop cackling and I was emulating their laugh and throwing shit at them the whole time?

Hahahaha, fucking Hot Fuzz. Greatest movie ever, worst women ever.

For me it was

1. The hulk
2. hills have eyes 2
3. aVp
4.knocked up
5.any of the 'scary movie' line except the 1st one
6. idk, usually when i see a movie in theatres I make sure I'll like it first.

Yea, awsome movie, terrible theatre experience.

3 ninjas - the greatest movie ever?
haha, it's so cheesy. it was on demand last month so I watched it again and felt let down, yet again.

post by MarkFuckingRichards at Oct 27,2008 11:27am

I don't think I can come up with 10, and I'm sure there are several movies that sucked more than the ones I'm going to list, but can't remember them...probably for a good reason. This list is in no particular order.

1. The Hulk (Ang Lee, of course) - This movie could have been abridged to 45 minutes, or at least just cut down to the dog-ball punching scene. A guy behind me answered his cell phone in the middle of the movie, and I was more interested in hearing what his conversation was about. Most of the theater could hear him clear as day and no one cared, haha. Fuck this movie.


3. Jeepers Creepers - I refused to see this movie, but Dave Maggot said it was going to be awesome (haha, I'm totally throwing you under the bus), so I trusted his judgment. I can never forgive you Dave, haha. This movie started out with promise; if the angel of death faggot just stayed a creepy, backwoods hick with a cavern made out of human corpses, this movie would have ruled. I knew I was watching the gayest movie ever (even gayer than gay porn) when the jeeper creeper guy made out with a decapitated male cop's head. The only thing that made this movie enjoyable was the constant heckling and jokes coming from pretty much everyone in the theater.

4. Cabin Fever - Looking back on it, this movie was pretty damn entertaining. BUT, at the time I wanted to kill myself. I was expecting a decent horror movie, not a half-assed horror/comedy or whatever the fuck it turned out to be. There were some good lines, some nice gory scenes and some total curve balls, but in the end I probably would have been better off staying home and masturbating.

5. Queen Of The Damned - I didn't expect to be floored by this movie, but was interested in it nonetheless. This was the first and only movie I ever fell asleep during in a theater. I can't even tell you what this movie was about except that Aaliyah was the Queen and some douchebag was some big rock and roll star who played some huge concert, blah blah blah, the end.




i'll throw myself under the bus here. im responsible for mark seeing these ones. for a while he wouldnt go to the movies with me at all because of these epic fail choices.

i totally forgot to add queen of the damned to my list. at the time it was my favorite book. but the movie was shit. that wouldve been my number one if i didnt completely forget i saw it at theaters.

I know a lot of people dissagre, but i LOVED hitchhikers guide. I am obsessed with the books, and i thought they actually did a good job of representing the books.

My worst was something i was dragged too with a girl as well..... and i bet it's worse than all of yours..... How stella got her groove back.

1.STOP OR MY MOM WILL SHOOT
2.THAT JULIANA MOORE MOVIE WHERE SHE IS LOOKING FOR HER KID. LEFT HALF WAY THROUGH.
3. BATMAN AND ROBIN
4. THE HOLIDAY ( WAS ON A DATE)
5. 10 THINGS I HATE ABOUT YOU (SEE ABOVE)

oh yeah i thought of another one. somehow i was dragged to see Enough with Jennifer Lopez.

ok.....what is with all the cabin fever hate??
i loved that fucking movie!!!
i know it had a troma feel, that's why i loved it....i would also pay to see "Bloodsucking Freaks" and "The Toxic Avenger" in the theaters!

i saw Cabin Fever once at a big theater, and three times at cheapo (two dollars a seat) joint that plays second run flicks.

oh well, anyway, for me the 10 worst (in no particular order)

1.Contact - 3 fucking hours! boring! minimal payoff at the end!

2.Sex and the City (My Woman dragged me.....i got great head while watching Japanese porn that morning.......then after i came, she asked if i would take her to see it at the cinema pub.....ya know how your brain gets after head. right?)

3.The Core - i have never been so bored in a movie theater in my entire life, probably the only piece of shit i have seen on the big screen that was more boring than "Contact"

4.Evan Almighty - i thought the Jim Carey one was kinda funny, i had movie passes, so i gave this one a shot......i want my movie pass back

5.Click - i have almost completely run out of faith in Adam Sandler

6.Anything Else - i saw it because someone told me it was funny. i love old Woody Allen flicks, and i have a permastiffy for Christina Ricci, so i checked it out.....other than seeing Christina Ricci in her bra and panties, big waste of time.

7.Austin Powers : Goldmember - ENOUGH RECYCLED JOKES PLEASE!!! THANK YOU

8.Vacancy - the premise seemed kinda scary, i almost fell asleep. so unexciting

9.Scary Movie 4 - my mom wanted to see it, i went....other than Chris Eliot's bit part, complete, unfunny waste of time

10.every chick flick i've ever been dragged to is tied for one of the worst i've ever seen (yes i know sex in the city is a chick flick....but also the only one where a chick shits her pants....that part, was mildly amusing)

scary movie 3 (never saw any spoof movie after this)

The Hobbit: An Unexpected Letdown

I just want to chime in and say that Mean Girls rules. Fuck you, aril.

shutup fagget

1. Coneheads - I wanted to go see Rookie of the Year. My little cousin threw a fit and insisted we see Coneheads. He hated it and wanted to leave 30 minutes in, so my brother and I made him sit there and watch it as a punishment. Saw Rookie of the Year shortly after. Choice vindicated.

2. Diary of the Dead - Romero is a hack and sucks. I will not be disputed.

3. 500 Days of Summer - Saw it on a blind date. Girl's choice. Got so pissed off at it that I never talked to the girl again. Eventually wrote ITS "Die Alone Or You're A Pussy" over it.

4. Bingo - The movie about the dog. My brother and I walked out and snuck into Hot Shots. Again, choice vindicated.

5. The Grudge - The festering centerpiece at the height of the Japanese horror adaptation craze of the early 2000's. My gf at the time talked me into going to see it despite the fact that she had ALREADY SEEN IT. Still can't wrap my brain around the decision to make me pay to watch this movie knowing full well how bad it is. Broke up shortly after. Choice once again vindicated.

Coneheads is amazing.

false statement is false

What's not to like about Coneheads??

I thought the new Nightmare on Elm Street was trash. Saw that shit in lux level and got shitty though so zero-sum there.

Uh... High Crimes with Morgan Freeman was abominable. I think that was the only time I left the theater in the middle of a movie.

Movie should have been made in the late 70's early 80's at the very least. Subway product placement in the movie, and no black conehead guy (garret morrision?).

Michelle Burke's ass in swimsuit > price of admission

Would you bang her while she is wearing the conehead?

No. I would use the senso-ring, noob.

ya do that homo

The Avengers. total shit.

House Arrest
Queen of the Damned
Doom
Star Wars: Phantom Menace
The Cell

Yea, Doom was right up there as one of the worst movies I've ever seen. Hated that movie... yet I own it :\

Maybe it'll grow on you haha...

Forgot:
Battlefield Earth

So douchey...

Ang Lee Hulk: I took my 8 year old nephew to see it, he wore his Hulk t-shirt, Wolverine sneakers and brought a Hulk action figure to the theater. After 45 minutes he loudly wondered "IS HE EVER GOING TO BE THE HULK?" and asked to leave. We obliged and he threw the action figure in the garbage on the way out of the theater.

This is the only review you need of this shitty movie.

I rarely go to the movies...and I rarely went when i was younger so this is more a list of movies I remember seeing in the theaters.

Romeo & Juliet (with Leo DiCaprio)....went on a date with Kim Aguiere. I actually really like this movie still to this day so....there's that.

Nightmare Before Christmas: again on a date with Lauren Tompsen... meh. never been a big fan of these movies but it was kinda cool on the big screen


Dirty Work: we drank beers in the theater and got kicked out about 20 minutes before it ended...still one of my fav comedy movies ever.


Time Machine: Ok, i regret this one. movie sucks...but conceptually some of the scene where the dude passes out on the time machine lever and just shoots through time and the earth is changing around the machine are really cool.


all 3 star wars special editions...only movies I've ever camped out to see opening night... not much else to say.


cant think of anymore right now.

I wonder, is it possible that you are using these women as a safety blanket to go see these fag movies that you mentioned, with the exception of Dirty Work.

i was using these women as a pin cushion for my penis...actually thats not true in the case of Nightmare Before Christmas cause I was like 11 years old or some shit when that came out

we're talking 1993 and 1996

The guy I dated in high school had the shittiest taste in movies ever: Lost In Space, Armageddon, Godzilla (the American one), Doctor Fucking Doolittle, Krippendorf's Tribe, Phantom Menace

Doom, that was another shitty date

The Last House On The Left remake, why was this even made?

The Room - was funny when the MST3K guys were providing the jokes in my living room instead of the troll woman behind me screaming it in my ear at the Coolidge

The only three movies Ive ever walked out of were Speed 2, star wars attack of the clones and Matrix Reloaded.

you liked Speed 1 enough to go see Speed 2 in theaters?

Star Wars Phantom Menace, Batman & Robin, Semi-Pro, 8 Crazy Nights, Mr. Deeds.

Or the guy next to me who kept yelling BECAUSE YOU'RE A WOMAN! the whole time.

Blades Of Glory and The Aqua Teen Movie.

hahahaha that's so american

I found spoons in my purse like a week later

That was the first and last time I ever felt sorry for Wren.

The Room is a fantastic movie though. its so retarded. I have a signed copy.

shutup fagget

Good call. A terrible piece of shit. I was so disappoint.