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New site? Maybe some day. 
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I was walking around the house today in my boxers, and got hungry so I nuked a couple Tinas burritos, and proceded to eat them. After, I took my dog outside and tied him on his lead and went back inside. After about 20 minutes the burritos decided it was time to move on. I was sitting down on the shitter for about 2 minutes, I heard my dog bark and run by the window, and thought OH SHIT ( i live on a busy street and my dog is not afraid of traffic ). He had got loose somehow. I iinstantly got up off the commode ( without wiping ) and ran outside to find him. My two old cenile neighbors were outside in the yard watching me run around half naked, they said he had taken off up the street so I ran after him. All of these people in their cars were laughing at me and honking their horns. I finnaly caught up to my dog and carried him back down the road. Then I see a Keene Police cruiser a few cars ahead of me coming towards me. Yeah well he wanted to see what was going on. So he had pulled his car off to the side and I stood there on the sidewalk almost naked in skidmarked underwear holding my dog. By now there is a few people on the other side of the street gathered, just watching. After a few minutes of explaining the cop decides my story sounds legit and lets me go. I begin my walk of shame back to my house ( meanwhile dozens of people laughing and honking at me) So yeah thats my story and that was all before 10:30 am. |
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You need a percocet or six. |
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anonymous said: | I was walking around the house today in my boxers, and got hungry so I nuked a couple Tinas burritos, and proceded to eat them. After, I took my dog outside and tied him on his lead and went back inside. After about 20 minutes the burritos decided it was time to move on. I was sitting down on the shitter for about 2 minutes, I heard my dog bark and run by the window, and thought OH SHIT ( i live on a busy street and my dog is not afraid of traffic ). He had got loose somehow. I iinstantly got up off the commode ( without wiping ) and ran outside to find him. My two old cenile neighbors were outside in the yard watching me run around half naked, they said he had taken off up the street so I ran after him. All of these people in their cars were laughing at me and honking their horns. I finnaly caught up to my dog and carried him back down the road. Then I see a Keene Police cruiser a few cars ahead of me coming towards me. Yeah well he wanted to see what was going on. So he had pulled his car off to the side and I stood there on the sidewalk almost naked in skidmarked underwear holding my dog. By now there is a few people on the other side of the street gathered, just watching. After a few minutes of explaining the cop decides my story sounds legit and lets me go. I begin my walk of shame back to my house ( meanwhile dozens of people laughing and honking at me) So yeah thats my story and that was all before 10:30 am. |
That really was a pretty cool story!!! Post more often dude!!!
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No dog is worth that,Now percocet on the other hand........... |
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anonymous said: | So he had pulled his car off to the side and I stood there on the sidewalk almost naked in skidmarked underwear holding my dog. |
HE'S LIKE, DUDE
YOU FUCK THE DOG IN THE ASS
NOT VICE VERSA
AND EAT MEATLOAF
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Yeah, that sounds delicious! |
 
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