I'm melting things in my fire.
I just completely melted 2 cans.
where the hell did my eyebrows go?

did you become whoopi goldberg?

no, I was just too close to th efire.

damn, cause I was going to ask you to autograph my coppie of "Burglar" and "Eddie"

it was funny watching all the hair on my hand get burnt to a crisp in less than a flash of a second the time i stuck my hand up to my gas stove for immediate worth. I got more than what i bargained for, and it took my mind off of my boredom.

we had a bonfire one time and we put a door over it to try and make it ridiculously huge...so my drunk ass decided to run over it barefoot while it was still intact...or so i thought

my foot went through it and into the fire...stupid but fuckin hilarious

bored at home?
i'm insulted...didn't you have fun earlier when we were downtown?

oh this is because i didn't drink any monster drinks (unlike you) and i fell i asleep

sounds like somebody needs some whiskey and scissorfight!