My folks are pretty trusting people. Trusting enough to let someone in our house to work on a hardwood floor in one room with no supervision. As my mother and little bro was next door avoiding the noise, my step dad was working outside in the yard this Douchebag named Matt decides he's going to snoop around in my Folk's/Bro's room. As it stands, he made off with about $40-50 in change, coins, friggen round things, yeah that's right, he stole that much change and didn't think anyone would notice.

My step dad always has his shit organized and he puts change into little containers in their closet so he went to do that the night of this incident and they were gone from their usual spot and thrown up on the top shelf behind his hats that are always perfectly straight but now jumbled sideways. The containers were indeed empty and as was my brothers cup filled with change. The next morning my Mother also noticed her droor was partially opened and when she opened it everything was all jumbled around.

After finally contacting the guys boss (owner of the flooring company) the next day he came right over. While he just tried to take in all the info before coming to the conclusion of having to actually fire this employee who in fact has 3 CHILDREN. That's right, this retard put his family in jepoardy for some change. A police report has been filed. So this guy was supposively going to be fired yesterday (monday) and now my family is worried about this guy retaliating since he knows where we live. I guess we're going to get a security system now, gay. I can see myself tripping that off accidentally all the time and having to pay $40 for a false alarm.

So yeah, basically the moral is, I guess you still can't trust anyone even when they come across as nice! He did a good job on the floor, too bad for him it will be his last flooring job in someone else's home. My room is a few feet below ground level and I have 4 windows in my room so if he's going to break in he'll probably meet me first. I have a 12" knife next to my bed in case he does. My folks have my old wooden louisville slugger that weighs more than me

that is wrong, i hope this piece of shit's wife leaves him
and he rots in a gutter with his change

i hope he dies of gonorrhea and rots in hell! what a sports nut, huh?

yeah that is pretty bogus, i still trust people, but never enough to leave a stranger alone in my house

RustedAngel said:

If he breaks in you can legally stab him to death or cave his skull with the bat. Either way, Porphyria will have some awesome coverart.

SacreligionNLI said:

I hope he dies of PORPHYRIA, hah hah, get it?

I guess he was talking football with my Stepdad as well, he also said as he was leaving "Nice Bose System"...

which kind of porphyria are we talking here, sonic or chemical?

you should try to rig up your bose system with an alchemic device created to trigger porphyria, just let your family know not to touch it

We'll also set it up so it plays a PORPHYRIA song while it releases it.

yes!

you know what would be funny? if you guys went and kicked the living shit out of this dude.

especially if you found the change and realized that you'd left it somewhere else right afterwards.

that does suck though. man.

davefromthegrave said:

hahah yeah, but it definitely couldn't have been anyone else.

I doubt the guy would 'retaliate'
Honestly, I doubt hell even be fired.
If the guy breaks into your house, theres a 99% chance that a knife will accomplish nothing, 12" long or not.
Shitty.

Wait, why the hell do you still live in yer moms basement?!?!

powerkok said:

Why wouldn't he be fired, the owners buisness is based on word of mouth so why would he keep an employee known for theft? He also said he was going to fire him Monday.

I'm sorry I don't have an arsenal of automatic weapons at my disposal

I live with my folks because I have 2 college loans I'm still paying off. A house someday would be a better investment than just paying some random douchebag money every month for some gay apartment. We'll see though.

RustedAngel said:

you might be eventually

also don't trust e mails sent to you buy a nigerian business man asking for your account number

BobNOMAAMRooney nli said:


Put corpsepaint on him afterwards.