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returntothepit >> discuss >> Jude Law has a small pee pee by succubus on Aug 17,2005 9:04pm
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toggletoggle post by succubus  at Aug 17,2005 9:04pm
JUDE LAW FAILS TO IMPRESS WHERE IT COUNTS
"That was the surprise reaction of unimpressed female media types who got a sneak peek at full-frontal nude shots of Jude Law that are being shopped to the tabloids.

In snapshots that recall George Costanza's infamous "shrinkage" episode on "Seinfeld," the love-rat actor's meager manhood is on full display as he changes into a swimsuit outside his mother Maggie Law's house in Vaudelnay, France.

"He's no Tommy Lee, that's for sure," sighed one unimpressed publicist who viewed copies of the paparazzi pix obtained by PAGE SIX.

Late yesterday afternoon, e-mail images of the photos were being forwarded around the offices of Women's Wear Daily under the headline "Jude in the Nude in France," and accompanied by a not-so-subtle dig at Law's loins: "Ha!"

Law's rep, Simon Halls, declined to discuss his client's apparently puny package, telling us: "Oh, please! The guy is on vacation in France with his kids. People need to give him a little bit of a break."

When we asked Halls if Law, 32, is crying in one photo that shows him grimacing while talking on the phone outside the house — he supposedly has been begging former fiancée Sienna Miller to take him back — the rep scoffed, "Come on — he's got the sun in his eyes!"

Law has seen his A-list image take a nosedive after his kids' former nanny, 26-year-old Daisy Wright, blabbed to the London papers last month that she and Law had "mind-blowing, rampant sex" during a secret fling.

Law's ex-wife, Sadie Frost, angrily fired Wright after one of the couple's sons told her how he'd caught Daddy in the sack with the nanny. As a result, Law's actress fiancée, Miller, 23, ripped off her ring and called an end to their engagement.

A remorseful Jude, who admitted his betrayal, is reportedly desperate to win Miller back, sending her flowers and deluging her with tearful phone calls. Since the scandal, Miller has been spotted hanging out with ex-boyfriend Orlando Bloom."



toggletoggle post by succubus  at Aug 17,2005 9:17pm
holy crap!
look at all the hair
http://www.supload.com/free/dm22-478847.jpg/view/



toggletoggle post by succubus  at Aug 17,2005 9:20pm
http://www.supload.com/free/dm21-336722.jpg/view/
holy geez
and pre implants and boob job...though if you saw the movie with rob lowe you already saw them




toggletoggle post by fizzfizzplopplop at Aug 17,2005 9:22pm
ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww



toggletoggle post by Dissector   at Aug 17,2005 9:24pm
succubus said:
holy crap!
look at all the hair
http://www.supload.com/free/dm22-478847.jpg/view/


That's gross.



toggletoggle post by jonny8pins at Aug 17,2005 9:26pm
that is one lawn i wouldnt mind trimming!



toggletoggle post by succubus  at Aug 17,2005 9:30pm
i figured make a thread about pee pees and then link to a female
haha

you recognize her right?
now dating a guy half her age...someone linked me the jude law story and photo and i was more entertained by those

as for the pee pee pic..whatever



toggletoggle post by Hooker nli at Aug 17,2005 9:31pm
demi?



toggletoggle post by fizzfizzplopplop at Aug 17,2005 9:31pm
wow, and people say that plastic surgery is bad. i beg to differ



toggletoggle post by Hooker nli at Aug 17,2005 9:34pm
real tits > fake tits


always



toggletoggle post by succubus  at Aug 17,2005 9:35pm
Hooker nli said:
demi?


yep




toggletoggle post by fizzfizzplopplop at Aug 17,2005 9:35pm
yes when they arent the same as a fat 12 year old boys tits



toggletoggle post by succubus  at Aug 17,2005 9:35pm
fizzfizzplopplop said:
yes when they arent the same as a fat 12 year old boys tits


hahahahahaahahaha



toggletoggle post by fizzfizzplopplop at Aug 17,2005 9:40pm
so does this man



toggletoggle post by fizzfizzplopplop at Aug 17,2005 9:40pm
god the female form is so much better



toggletoggle post by jonny8pins at Aug 17,2005 9:41pm
ha ha ha you gotta give this guy credit it takes alot of balls to...well...then again i guess it doesnt.ha ha ha



toggletoggle post by fizzfizzplopplop at Aug 17,2005 9:42pm
hahahahahahaha



toggletoggle post by succubus  at Aug 17,2005 9:43pm
hahahahaha

that guy has a tiny pee pee, i think jude law's looks normal
http://gamma.applepics.com/7/userfiles/43025c25a9738.jpg
just a bad angle maybe?



toggletoggle post by jonny8pins at Aug 17,2005 9:43pm
he has to be aware of that i just cant believe anyone wouldnt be a able to tell if the general was out of the bunker



toggletoggle post by succubus  at Aug 17,2005 9:44pm
did you guys see the pic the rev took of another band with his wee wee sticking out?



toggletoggle post by fizzfizzplopplop at Aug 17,2005 9:44pm
is he circumsized? not too small. i guess



toggletoggle post by jonny8pins at Aug 17,2005 9:47pm
succubus said:
did you guys see the pic the rev took of another band with his wee wee sticking out?

unfortunately i missed that one but its kind of disturbing that has happened more than once maybe this will take the place of the horns



toggletoggle post by fizzfizzplopplop at Aug 17,2005 9:47pm
guten nacht...i will have pleasant dreams now of weiners dancing all through my head....arggggg.



toggletoggle post by jonny8pins at Aug 17,2005 9:49pm
hopefully theyll be bigger than this clowns!



toggletoggle post by fizzfizzplopplop at Aug 17,2005 9:53pm
hopefully......mmmmmm.



toggletoggle post by jonny8pins at Aug 17,2005 9:56pm
nothing better than a big fat cock to put a smile on a girls face



toggletoggle post by pre-school race war at Aug 17,2005 11:48pm
of course he's small he's ENGLISH



toggletoggle post by dwellingsickness at Aug 18,2005 7:40am
fizzfizzplopplop said:
so does this man




Hey look it is Sebastian Bach with Corpse Paint



toggletoggle post by succubus  at Aug 18,2005 7:57am
pre-school race war said:
of course he's small he's ENGLISH

looked normal
that corpse paint guy is small



toggletoggle post by anonymous at Aug 18,2005 10:40am
it's not the size of the wand, it's the magic in it



toggletoggle post by succubus  at Aug 18,2005 10:41am
touche



toggletoggle post by boobtoucher  at Aug 18,2005 10:44am
FRIGGIN WEINERS



toggletoggle post by dirteecrayon nli at Aug 18,2005 10:47am
i'd like to see some ethan hawke pics heh



toggletoggle post by i am nli at Aug 18,2005 10:56am
heath ledger is supposed to be pretty small too



toggletoggle post by largefreakatzero at Aug 18,2005 10:59am
I just saw those bush pictures. That is not right. Excessive bush = not hot. Ladies, please trim regulary or shave completely (that's better).



toggletoggle post by succubus  at Aug 18,2005 11:00am
even if i stopped shaving totally i would NEVER be that hairy



toggletoggle post by largefreakatzero at Aug 18,2005 11:27am
succubus said:
even if i stopped shaving totally i would NEVER be that hairy


And I am sure Aaron appreciates that.



toggletoggle post by RustedAngel at Aug 18,2005 12:04pm
succubus said:
hahahahaha

that guy has a tiny pee pee, i think jude law's looks normal
http://gamma.applepics.com/7/userfiles/43025c25a9738.jpg
just a bad angle maybe?


do girls realize that when a pp is soft it is usually small? a pp can grow at least 2x the size so there is no way to really know unless you see his junk boned out.



toggletoggle post by the_reverend   at Aug 18,2005 12:08pm
that girl looks like a bush baby.



toggletoggle post by succubus  at Aug 18,2005 12:44pm
again, that girl=demi moore pre implants
and his pee pee looked normal to me as i said above when you quoted me...the media went into a frenzy



toggletoggle post by retzam at Aug 18,2005 12:46pm
RustedAngel said:
succubus said:
hahahahaha

that guy has a tiny pee pee, i think jude law's looks normal
http://gamma.applepics.com/7/userfiles/43025c25a9738.jpg
just a bad angle maybe?


do girls realize that when a pp is soft it is usually small? a pp can grow at least 2x the size so there is no way to really know unless you see his junk boned out.



This is true.



toggletoggle post by DrinkHardThrashHard  at Aug 18,2005 12:52pm
This post is officially shallow, and so am I for posting in it.



toggletoggle post by Ma_Dukes  at Aug 18,2005 1:41pm
no shit it gets bigger, i think the majority of women would be even bitchier if it didnt work that way...however i have seen the opposite hold true too though..big soft...doesnt get much bigger hard..poor ol chum...wonder what happened to him.



toggletoggle post by kRIStEn D. at Aug 18,2005 1:44pm
i don't know what all the fuss is about, you can't judge it when its soft. trust me i've seen my share



toggletoggle post by Joe Christianni's Girlfriend at Aug 18,2005 1:45pm
I've seen my fair share and that's 10 times the size of my Joey's



toggletoggle post by Ma_Dukes  at Aug 18,2005 1:46pm
first impressions stick..hehehehe



toggletoggle post by Ma_Dukes  at Aug 18,2005 1:46pm
who is joe christiani?



toggletoggle post by the_reverend   at Aug 18,2005 1:48pm
don't they know about shrinkage?

http://davidmlane.com/hyperstat/A108353.html



toggletoggle post by Ma_Dukes  at Aug 18,2005 1:50pm
yes i know about shrinkage. actually i am really intreugied by these things that male genitalia do. warm? balls drop. cold weiny shrinks and balls try and be ovaries. it is pretty cool.



toggletoggle post by succubus  at Aug 18,2005 1:54pm
hahahahaha
is this turning into let me tell you how many penises I've seen?

LMAO

Only 1 for me and it's the only one that matters
EOS



toggletoggle post by Ma_Dukes  at Aug 18,2005 1:55pm
there is a difference in how many one has seen and how many one has actually, umm.....used, i guess is the right termanology.



toggletoggle post by Ma_Dukes  at Aug 18,2005 1:57pm
i have had many male friends over the years who were careless when they hung out in just their undies, or who just didnt care who saw their junk. or who were too wasted to realize they werent wearing anything....yuck.



toggletoggle post by succubus  at Aug 18,2005 1:58pm
no, no...i wasn't insulting you...it was the other "girl's" post..which is probably a joke anyhow...



toggletoggle post by kRIStEn D. at Aug 18,2005 1:59pm
i've seen/used a few and like i said, you can not judge until it gets



toggletoggle post by Ma_Dukes  at Aug 18,2005 2:01pm
oh it is all good succubutt lady. i didnt think you were callin me a hootch, i was just sayin!



toggletoggle post by the_reverend   at Aug 18,2005 2:08pm
guys need to watch what hangs out.



toggletoggle post by Ma_Dukes  at Aug 18,2005 2:09pm
ewww



toggletoggle post by kRIStEn D. at Aug 18,2005 2:10pm
yuck



toggletoggle post by succubus  at Aug 18,2005 2:12pm
eww and yuck are more suited for the guy in corpse paint above
i seriously SHUDDER when i see that



toggletoggle post by the_reverend   at Aug 18,2005 2:12pm
actually, somewhere, I have a picture of my dad pushing a ewe's uterus back in after she gave birth.
talk about ew.



toggletoggle post by Ma_Dukes  at Aug 18,2005 2:14pm
my friend lee grew up on a farm and used to have to do that all the time, talk all non-schalontly about it. yummy*licks chops*



toggletoggle post by succubus  at Aug 18,2005 2:17pm



toggletoggle post by Ma_Dukes  at Aug 18,2005 2:19pm
look at the guy above him smilin at it...perv. man i am glad to have internal genitalia for reasons like this. well boobs, that is a different story. they have a mind of their own too.



toggletoggle post by kRIStEn D. at Aug 18,2005 2:20pm
yeah the guy in the corpse paint please guys, stop posting it. and what is up with the link above? uhhhhh



toggletoggle post by kRIStEn D. at Aug 18,2005 2:21pm
i'd post some of my ex BF's pics but that would be too cruel



toggletoggle post by Ma_Dukes  at Aug 18,2005 2:22pm
it is called a penis.



toggletoggle post by succubus  at Aug 18,2005 2:22pm
yes they do and after wearing blouses (size L and i'm not fat) anyhow...after recently wearing them, i remembered why i don't usually wear them...esp when i'm at work and the "important" button pops off or undoes itself...
sigh
today i have a tank top and a blouse OVER it that is only buttoned on the bottom.



toggletoggle post by kRIStEn D. at Aug 18,2005 2:22pm
i know but you can barely see it!



toggletoggle post by Ma_Dukes  at Aug 18,2005 2:24pm
and it was only posted twice....and my ex bf's winkie is all over the internet. i caught him "cyber-cheating" on me. i walked in our computer room one night when he thought that i was asleep and he was buck neked jerkin it with some lotion to a chick spread eagle web cammin each other. i laughed at him so hard and left him a week later. fag.



toggletoggle post by succubus  at Aug 18,2005 2:25pm
wow what an asshole!
good for you for leaving him
i'm sure yer with someone better now



toggletoggle post by succubus  at Aug 18,2005 2:26pm



toggletoggle post by Ma_Dukes  at Aug 18,2005 2:27pm
yes i am kyle is awesome. plus he prefers real vagina as oppossed to "cyberpussy"



toggletoggle post by kRIStEn D. at Aug 18,2005 2:27pm
Well i only caught my ex exchanging pics over the internet to some girl that cuts his hair. he also thought i was asleep but i snuck up on him. it was funny, he tried to cover the screen as fast as he could but - BUSTED! We had a talk the next day about it but i left him. found some emails as well. and guys, don't make your passwords so easy.



toggletoggle post by Ma_Dukes  at Aug 18,2005 2:28pm
carina! you make me laugh! rahhhhhahahahahahaha! plus, kyle and i make cute babies, so he's a keeper.



toggletoggle post by kRIStEn D. at Aug 18,2005 2:30pm
succubus said:
just for you kristin since you want a better look
http://www.returntothepit.com/media.php?id=118961&date=sept092004&pic=bury_your_dead058.jpg


ick.




toggletoggle post by Ma_Dukes  at Aug 18,2005 2:31pm
was he totally oblivious that his love pump was singing too?



toggletoggle post by kRIStEn D. at Aug 18,2005 2:35pm
hey my old roomate use to tell me at the grocery store some kid use to do this for kicks. like have a hole there and... ugh no thank you please!



toggletoggle post by Ma_Dukes  at Aug 18,2005 2:37pm
you make it sound like dicks aint fun!



toggletoggle post by kRIStEn D. at Aug 18,2005 2:40pm
of course they are but it depends on who they are attached to



toggletoggle post by Ma_Dukes  at Aug 18,2005 2:41pm
as long as there as paper bags my friend!



toggletoggle post by Ma_Dukes  at Aug 18,2005 2:44pm
life is good



toggletoggle post by kRIStEn D. at Aug 18,2005 2:44pm
HEHEHEHEH okok.

i just broke up with my BF two weeks ago. see story above



toggletoggle post by Ma_Dukes  at Aug 18,2005 2:46pm
saw it.....do a few shots of Jack, get a paper bag, get a piece then you will feel much better in the morning!



toggletoggle post by Ma_Dukes  at Aug 18,2005 2:46pm
man i am glad i do not heed my own advice



toggletoggle post by kRIStEn D. at Aug 18,2005 2:46pm
i might just do that this weekend, rebound time



toggletoggle post by Ma_Dukes  at Aug 18,2005 2:48pm
use a condom



toggletoggle post by kRIStEn D. at Aug 18,2005 2:49pm
ALWAYS



toggletoggle post by Sacreligion at Aug 18,2005 3:01pm
the last half of this thread has been nothing but females...i broke the chain

orrrr did i?



toggletoggle post by Ma_Dukes  at Aug 18,2005 3:05pm
thank you sir!



toggletoggle post by succubus  at Aug 18,2005 3:06pm
i have no clue



toggletoggle post by Ma_Dukes  at Aug 18,2005 3:06pm
me neither



toggletoggle post by Sacreligion at Aug 18,2005 3:07pm
a race of atomic monsters with octagonal shaped bodies that suck blood!



toggletoggle post by kRIStEn D. at Aug 18,2005 3:13pm
WHAAA



toggletoggle post by Hooker nli at Aug 18,2005 3:25pm
I have a cloaca.



toggletoggle post by hoser at Aug 18,2005 4:06pm
Kristen has seen piles and piles of cocks.......BILLIONS of cocks!!!!!!



toggletoggle post by the_reverend   at Aug 18,2005 4:12pm



toggletoggle post by horror_tang  at Aug 18,2005 4:22pm
Since Jude is often a woman's name, perhaps she is just a small breasted woman with a large clit.



toggletoggle post by succubus  at Aug 18,2005 4:27pm
i'm guessing most people didn't click on the first 2 links i posted



toggletoggle post by fizzfizzplopplop at Aug 18,2005 5:50pm
BARFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF shaveshaveshave......



toggletoggle post by fizzfizzplopplop at Aug 18,2005 5:50pm
i wonder if she ever got head?



toggletoggle post by pre-school race war at Aug 18,2005 5:55pm
i am nli said:
heath ledger is supposed to be pretty small too


of couse he is he's australian



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