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New site? Maybe some day.
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Any volunteers?
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I thought you had a girlfriend? |
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Guess the boss still hasn't given you that blonde polished yet, huh? |
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No i havent received my well deserved under the desk penis polisher and my girlfriend has some sort of phalluphobia. She likes getting fucked wicked hard but hates touching cock and god forbid i ask her to suck on it. Youd think with all the head i give her shed get over it but i guess not. I like getting head goddamnit!!!! |
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Christraper said: No i havent received my well deserved under the desk penis polisher and my girlfriend has some sort of phalluphobia. She likes getting fucked wicked hard but hates touching cock and god forbid i ask her to suck on it. Youd think with all the head i give her shed get over it but i guess not. I like getting head goddamnit!!!! |
time for a new girlfriend buddy! hahahaha |
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TSK, TSK...
Sounds like the lil lady is being selfish.........not giving but receiving!!!
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I know!!!! Like what the fuckity fuck??? I dont discuss this with her because i dont want to be an asshole about it but yea, whats the big deal? I go down on her all the time. Normally id say fuck it and move on but aside from that shes wicked good in bed!!! |
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So i figure if this situation continues in this fashion i wont cheat on her but i WILL however accept "favors" here and there from generous friends on occasion. |
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mm, but thats a huge "aside from"...... |
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even though thats pretty much cheating on her. |
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Not if the friends are from diffferent zip codes.....
The ole, zip code rule! |
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ram_girl said: mm, but thats a huge "aside from"...... |
I KNOW!!!!!! And its not like ive got some smelly green leperous dick in my pants, she told right from the beginning that she doesnt give head and im thinkin "yea right we'll see..." but she really doesnt!!!!
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and you were OK with her telling you that!!!!!
She must be hot! |
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zip code rule? so all those times in south america didnt count? thats cool.
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never heard of the zip code rule...
if the chic your doing on the side is from a different zip code, then you aren't cheating!!! |
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yea shes pretty fuckin cute. really what made me stick around is the fact that she can make me laugh. Most girls cant do that. Thats usually how i decide whether or not i keep the girl im with. |
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i havent cheated on her so far. id prefer not to but she needs to take a walk in my shoes and loosen up a little. |
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Sounds like you need to be telling her that theres a problem and it ain't on your end! |
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im leaving work now but this conversation will be continued. i need some female perspective on this one. |
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ram_girl said: Sounds like you need to be telling her that theres a problem and it ain't on your end! |
yea but thats really the only problem and it seems a bit shallow to bring that up as an issue y'know?
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oh c'mon, if you started the message board i dont think telling her will be going to far.
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there is a quote in tom robbin's book.. um.. half asleep in frog pajamas where a 300lb girl says something like "show me the wife that doesn't suck cock and I'll show you a man I can steal". |
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You need a new girlfriend unless she starts giving you heads. Dude if you go down on her and if she doesn't give you heads, sorry but this is not fair and not fun. |
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ummm
that is nuts...if she refuses to give then you should refuse to do it to her
how fucking lame
no offense to her but if she loves you..she'll do it |
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the answer is clear.
stop going down on her unless she starts going down on you. |
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and if she doesn't love what you do....
maybe she should get a new boyfriend |
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wait wait wait..... I bet you're uncircumsized aren't you? |
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I just don't get it. What the fuck is wrong with that girl? |
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the_reverend said: the answer is clear.
stop going down on her unless she starts going down on you. |
hahaha we said the same thing
that's probably because we like doing it to each other
wooooooooo
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Christraper said: zip code rule? so all those times in south america didnt count? thats cool.
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lmao
I hear yah bro
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i'm telling you. this dude has to have a covered wagon. |
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swamplorddvm said:
an uncircumsized penis???
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homeboy's got a lamprey eel hanging from his crotch. of course a normal chick isn't gonna put that in her mouth. snip it duder. |
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in reference to the title of this thread... that goes endlessly without saying |
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hopefully c-raper is getting one now |
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whatever one woman won't do, there are a million others who will. |
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cheating on women is perfectly acceptable. |
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Soo, Christraper....did she polish the helmet....inquiring minds want to know?
Oh and the comments from the others here pretty much sum it up!!!
You need a new girlfriend unless she starts giving you heads. Dude if you go down on her and if she doesn't give you heads, sorry but this is not fair and not fun.
ummm
that is nuts...if she refuses to give then you should refuse to do it to her
the answer is clear.
stop going down on her unless she starts going down on you.
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Christraper....I never would have guessed!
I say give the girl a chance. She's still pretty young. If she won't do it now, I swear she'll grow into it, maybe.
The only reason I can think of to NOT give a guy head is if he's not clean, and you appear clean so that's probably not the issue.
The way I decide if I stick with a guy or not is based almost completely on his unit, how he uses it and how good it fits in all areas including my mouth. If someone could meet those requirements AND make me laugh, hell, I would be a happy camper.
Good luck. Oh yeah, and even if you got yourself a covered wagon down there....I'm sure she hasn't come across too many like that. So maybe she'd be scared off a lil, but nothin wrong with a covered wagon. Dick is dick and I like dick.
---Hold out on the cunt lapping...until she gives in---
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this is what you do...
tell her you want to play a game. tell her in this game "you can't use your hands", lay her flat on her back kind of in a jesus christ pose tell her to close her eyes, and in a split second, hop up on her and put your knees on her arms so she can't break free and do your thing. it always works. |
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jesusfucker said: Christraper....I never would have guessed!
I say give the girl a chance. She's still pretty young. If she won't do it now, I swear she'll grow into it, maybe.
The only reason I can think of to NOT give a guy head is if he's not clean, and you appear clean so that's probably not the issue.
The way I decide if I stick with a guy or not is based almost completely on his unit, how he uses it and how good it fits in all areas including my mouth. If someone could meet those requirements AND make me laugh, hell, I would be a happy camper.
Good luck. Oh yeah, and even if you got yourself a covered wagon down there....I'm sure she hasn't come across too many like that. So maybe she'd be scared off a lil, but nothin wrong with a covered wagon. Dick is dick and I like dick.
---Hold out on the cunt lapping...until she gives in---
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wanna date?
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buy some tasty lube... there's this stuff that tastes like sourish candy.... it's YUM! that might make her be more open to the task... |
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Where the hell is Christraper??
I hope he didn't say something to her last night and she stabbed him or something!!! |
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if he says something wrong, he can always just blame it on us... or me 'cos i'm a million miles away... |
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jesusfucker has the best female responce i've ever heard in my life...
im impressed and interested all in one post
bravo |
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KeithMutiny said: jesusfucker has the best female responce i've ever heard in my life...
im impressed and interested all in one post
bravo |
Yeah, she said it all too well. |
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KeithMutiny said: jesusfucker has the best female responce i've ever heard in my life...
im impressed and interested all in one post
bravo |
Thank you, thank you... I know what's up. |
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succubus said: swamplorddvm said:
an uncircumsized penis???
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?????????
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who is this mysterious jesusfucker? |
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She's the new guitarist from Esuriem's girlfriend. |
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any extra/unused BJ's left in this thread? |
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Manch also $5 ,on the corner of Valley and any of the crossing streets basically,but most of them have no teeth |
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wouldn't that be a gumjob?
*honks* |
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I get scared in manchvegas when I go onto pine st. |
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Christraper, here's might be a good Xmas present for her... I can find more if you need too (not sure if the price is wholesale or retail though)
Tickle His Pickle: Your Hands-On Guide to Penis Pleasing (Sadie Allison) $14.95 0970661126
A penis instruction manual for women. Sexy and inspiring, honest and provocative, it informs, entertains, and reveals the secrets of the penis. Features over 50 techniques to master oral lovemaking; dozens of ways to turn your hands into living sex toys; secret touching tips for the "Male G-Spot" and other pleasure zones; more. Over 100 b&w drawings.
http://www.lastgasp.com/d/24584/
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id like to give that too a few people i know for christmas |
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Holy shit. I wasnt online all weekend. I had no idea my whining would amount to so much. NO I DONT HAVE A COVERED WAGON GODDAMNIT!!!!! I had a rather interesting weekend though. I havent resolved anything with my girlfriend but I feel better anyways. And you guys dont understand. I LIKE going down on my girl. If i were to stop it would suck cuz...well...i like it. And youre probably right jesusfucker im sure she'll get over it eventually. |
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not eating poontang is like depriving yourself of life. |
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I give bad head. Ask Brad.
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meh. i can live without getting head. but not giving cunnilingus, i might as well be dead. |
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blue said: meh. i can live without getting head. but not giving cunnilingus, i might as well be dead. |
I like it too, fellas, but jesus christ listen to yourselves. You kidding me? |
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i think they are trying to kid themselves
lol |
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i no kid.
vagina > everything |
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Eating pussy rules. Watching a girl get off is one of lifes simple pleasures. |
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so whens that wedding again?
;) |
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Pretty damn soon if i dont straighten this shit out! |
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you two are just trying to get broads two swoon over you. |
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At least im being honest. And id also like to reiterate the fact that i am indeed circumsized.....so there. |
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does hooker have a covered wagon? |
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some girls have a problem giving head because its one of the features of sex they havent yet mastered, therefore feel uncomfortable performing... where as other sexual positions they are comfortable with, therefore, dont mind performing. You simply have to talk to her about it... bring it up gently, cuz if it sounds mean, she'll take offense, and then your dick outta luck. |
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if you are in an open relationship...you are supposed to tell each other what you like and what you don't...
it's pretty simple... |
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I'm telling you, get her that book! |
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i thought all penises were circumsized at birth --- like it's hospital procedure |
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hahah. succubus, how would you know? |
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but dear god no, I don't. |
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oh man my sophmore year of college, a group of my friends got a stripper for my friends 21st birthday --- he had a covered wagon and braces on his teeth
i was so traumatized! |
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dirteecrayon said: i thought all penises were circumsized at birth --- like it's hospital procedure |
nope
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Hooker said: hahah. succubus, how would you know? |
ummm because you told me silly!
at that show and then you asked me all about the rev's...
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i think christraper has a covered wagon!
he should show us or me rather so we could be 100% sure!
=) |
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Nope. It's whatever way you want it to be. You get to pick! |
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dirteecrayon said: i think christraper has a covered wagon!
he should show us or me rather so we could be 100% sure!
=) |
you asked for it.
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uhhh,
nevermind i might be disppointed with what i see
;) |
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succubus said: Hooker said:hahah. succubus, how would you know? |
ummm because you told me silly!
at that show and then you asked me all about the rev's...
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lies!! |
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pfft carina never lies!
she said that my cock was the biggest she ever seen! |
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you showed me a GIGANORMOUS black cock, so yeah, twas the biggest i've ever seen! |
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dirteecrayon said: uhhh,
nevermind i might be disppointed with what i see
;) |
Whawhawhat!!!!!
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:christraper takes a hard hit to his already shattered blowjobless ego: |
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The only time I've had a multiple orgasm (like 10 at once ) was from a blow job. |
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swamplorddvm said: The only time I've had a multiple orgasm (like 10 at once) was from a blow job. |
try an orgy
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No I'm talking about continuos orgasms one after the other within seconds. |
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Christraper said: :christraper takes a hard hit to his already shattered blowjobless ego: |
Hahahaha! If we had a signature line on here, that would be in mine.
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swamplorddvm said: No I'm talking about continuos orgasms one after the other within seconds. |
I think thats just called a really good orgasm.
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blow jobs scare me, every girl i've fooled with sucks at them (no pun intended) |
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i'm not a big fan of receiving
i've had some really bad traumatizing experiences
i got bit and it was not cool! |
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i try to give and receive at least twice a week |
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MyDeadDoll said: i try to give and receive at least twice a week |
whoa,
twice a week?!?!?!?
you're way too generous!
=) |
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twice a week isn't too generous...but i won't say anymore since i found out how many of the rev's relatives check this site out =) |
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girls stress me out so much that I need 100 bj's a day. |
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RustedAngel said: girls stress me out so much that I need 100 bj's a day. |
aha, so thats why you have soooo many myspace friends!
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dirteecrayon said:
aha, so thats why you have soooo many myspace friends!
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nah, that's just for looks. |
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RustedAngel said: girls stress me out so much that I need 100 bj's a day. |
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Blowjobs kick ass. I think ive earned one. |
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