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:	post by Alx_Casket at 2011-11-21 14:33:42

I was already letting them rip while holding up a clandestine ethic in my office in the AM hours at work. Then it was lunch time, and I didn't feel like going out into chinatown for cheap eats. Instead, I raided my work pantry and decided on a "Happy Monday? Fuck you" food choice:

It goes down easy and tastes pretty good. Not more than 20 minutes passes and I feel a slight gurgle in my bowels. Then another. All the while, metabolic chemical reactions producing both benign oxygen in addition to some putrid gases are occurring. I've done it again. I've unleashed the fucking Whole Foods 365 dragon. The onset of a universal choral ode to vegetarian food. My coworkers already think I'm weird for never eating in the break room and preferring to eat at my desk (internet > discussing weekend activities with those dolts), but now I'm positive that at least 4 of them have heard me rip ass from around the corner. They're mostly comprised of nurses, which leads me to wonder while intermittently passing wind, do they think I have some sort of farting disease? An hyperfunctioning lower intestine? This all brings me great joy. Fuck, I love farting. It really makes my day.

Sincerely,
Alx

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